Less About Quiet Quitting, More About Empathetic Leading
I read a stat recently that over a quarter of workers globally will quit their jobs in the next twelve months. More specifically, for my stateside community, 29% of workers in the US say they will leave their job in the next 12 months. But what’s more alarming is that 76% of U.S. workers reported at least one symptom of a mental health condition, and 84% of respondents said their workplace condition contributed to at least one mental health challenge, as reported in the Mind Share Partners’ 2021 Mental Health at Work Report.
Leaders, how do you manage what’s happening on your teams right now?
Let me share a scenario with you…
You’re primarily operating in a hybrid environment where it's up to the team to decide when and where they work, and finally, the team gets together in person for a brainstorming session. The energy is high, and people are motivated by the collaborative problem-solving, the body language, the whiteboarding, the movement, and the change in scenery. There’s consensus to come together more regularly to keep the momentum, so a weekly in-person brainstorm is planned. The following week rolls around, and someone can’t make it because of a family emergency, so a few other team members decide to join virtually. Then, the next week there are conflicting meetings and even fewer opt to join in person. Before you know it, the whole thing has unraveled.
Recently, a colleague shared this real-life example with me with his head in his hands. How does he keep morale up while simultaneously keeping everyone moving forward to deliver on their quarterly goals?
If you’re feeling a similar pain as my colleague referenced here, you might be noticing team members are prioritizing life outside of work in ways that are healthy for them as individuals but put the company in a pinch. Or maybe disengage in unhealthy ways for themselves and the company.
Both of these, as a leader, are fair concerns. So what do you do?
In my last article, I specifically spoke to the “quiet quitters” (which really just means people who are reprioritizing and redesigning their careers and their implications on the other parts of their lives). Now, I want to chat with the leaders.
Everyone has been through massive changes in the past few years, and their priorities have shifted because of these changes. This isn’t a bad thing. The reality is that business just doesn’t look the same as it did pre-pandemic, and instead of trying to continue on with the same tactics and team cultures we’ve built in the past, there is an opportunity as leaders to be a part of a constructive shift that employees have been asking for for a long time.
While it’s tempting to look outward for solutions, start by reflecting on your role as a leader.
This new wave of change requires a level of willingness to be self-reflective and the courage to lead your team through this growth. It’s essential to get really comfortable with the role you play in the changes and how you relate to each team member, which admittedly gets more challenging the larger the team. That means taking time to really get to know yourself. Here’s an Empathetic Leadership Reflection template I use with leaders I work with to facilitate that reflection. Additionally, I have found recently that reflecting on the answers to these questions is helpful when exploring your impact on your team.
How have the changes affected your own work?
How have the changes impacted other areas of your life?
How have your priorities changed?
What do you want from work/life going forward?
What does flexibility mean for you?
As a leader, you set the tone, and you significantly impact how your team responds to their work, so assessing your own experience and expectations is an important place to start. As you engage in more frequent self-reflection, consider how you’re demonstrating your expectations to your team. Do you talk about how you take advantage of health, wellness, and professional development benefits through the company or how you tend to your mental health with outlets like therapy, family time, etc.? Do you consider the time of day you’re sending your emails/messages to team members and what that signals to them? Have you reflected on how the standards you hold yourself to can reflect pressure on the team? Do you create space for vulnerability, mistakes, and learning? It’s important to be thoughtful about how you show up and intimately aware of the impact your actions, words, and habits have on your team.
Now, let’s take a look back at your team for a second. The ability to see people as whole people–with feelings, hopes, dreams, fears, and needs–is a core quality of an effective leader. So, as we do the work to reflect on our own personal experiences, we need to also unpack each person's individual experience on our teams and put their needs, as whole people, on the same level as our own. If people aren’t engaging the way you would hope, there could be a misalignment of expectations or a misunderstanding of needs. They could be distracted or worried about the looming recession, which is a valid concern as we continue to see massive layoffs stateside. There could also be other life things happening that require a different level of engagement at work. We won’t know what’s impacting the shift in energy until we spend time creating space for the team to share safely, and it's important that you are able to uncover this information to lead effectively.
Engage your team by asking & listening
In this era of change, remember that you don’t have to have all the answers. Your job as a leader is to uncover the answers by asking the right questions, creating a space for a shared vision to form. It’s important to invite your team to the table and for you to listen and hear them and appreciate what they share. You might be familiar with Brenee Brown’s famous quote: “Clear is Kind. Unclear is Unkind.” It’s crucial to offer your team clarity as a leader, and likewise, gaining clarity from your team by listening to them is just as crucial.
Take the time to facilitate a listening tour to solicit feedback either through small groups, one-on-one meetings, or surveys. Ask questions like: How are you feeling about your work? Are there things you would do differently if you were in charge? Is there anything I’m missing that would help move things forward with a project/the team/etc.? What do you need to feel successful at work? The solutions to building a healthy, thriving workplace again are in the answers to these questions, so stay open-minded and embrace what your team has to say.
Designing a new team culture
Once you’ve received feedback from the people on your teams, it’s time to take action and start designing a new way of work that will meet your team's needs and help focus the collective goal. If you feel overwhelmed by this or entirely stuck, it’s okay! Changing how your organization does things is never easy, but remember that things have already changed so much, and realigning expectations is the natural response. Bring your team along for the change and invite them to help you redesign by responding to the feedback with a team contract that you design together. Here’s a great Team Contract template designed by The Improv Effect that will help you co-create. Include things like collaboration methods and frequency, how to navigate a hybrid environment of any kind, preferred communication styles and mediums, expectations around response time, etc. Begin to rethink how you work together based on your team’s current needs, and let them be a part of it. If you’re nervous about facilitating an exercise like this where it feels out of your control, I recommend checking out this Liberatory Design Card Deck created by Beytna Design to help you feel more comfortable and confident facilitating co-creation.
Here’s an example to help illustrate what I mean. An old colleague of mine was a Director of People and Culture who built an “all-in” type of culture at his company. People loved being in the office. They lived and breathed their jobs, grew close with their colleagues as there were a lot of extracurricular bonding activities, and well… it worked for them. Then came the pandemic, and things changed. His employee’s priorities changed. Most importantly, he didn’t resist it. He read the proverbial room, and he listened.
Now he focuses on building a culture around his employee's priorities which have shifted to things like fully paid, good healthcare, time off, access to mental health support, childcare support, and access to perks that enrich their whole lives. It’s less about happy hours and networking events and more about making sure people have the flexibility they need in their lives and can be present in their lives outside of work responsibilities. This is what’s working at his current company–and it’s working for him, too, as a father who wants to be present with his family. He listened to what those around him needed and what he needed, and he redesigned the culture around it.
The way forward: Stay committed to this type of leadership
This won’t all happen overnight. It’s a process to make shifts, make mistakes, correct them, and keep moving forward. The important thing is to stay committed to listening and responding to the needs of your people. Keep strategizing how to support people as individuals in their careers and their lives.
Maybe you elect or hire someone, or a few people, to keep a pulse on the culture as it continues to evolve or conduct quarterly surveys or listening tours. Whatever you decide, prioritize clarity and keep asking questions. People are asking for change, so this is your chance to recreate your business and push it into a more sustainable future. It’s an opportunity to improve and build stronger teams and organizations that stand out among the rest. We would love to hear how you're adapting to the constant change on your team and leading more empathetically-- tell us how you're handling it.